Reflections on a 15-Year Reunion: Why Showing Up Matters

Now is the season of school celebrations — promotions, graduations, and yes, reunions! For many, reunions spark a mix of excitement and nerves. We’re thrilled to reconnect with old friends and relive cherished memories, but also anxious about judgment, acceptance, or comparison. That was certainly my rollercoaster of emotions before attending my 15-year grad school reunion.

I bought my ticket with genuine excitement. Yet, as the date drew closer, I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d made a mistake. Many of my closest friends weren’t coming, and the “what if I feel left out?” or “what if I’m not good enough?” thoughts started creeping in. Fast forward two days, and I was on the plane back home, feeling incredibly energized and profoundly grateful. What happened during those 48 hours that completely transformed my mindset?

If you have a reunion coming up and are still on the fence, read on. My experience might just help you make a decision you won’t regret.

The Judgment is (Mostly) in Your Head

When you haven’t seen friends for 15 years, their genuine concern isn’t about your job title or your relationship status. Trust me, they couldn’t care less. What they truly want to know is how you are, right now. They’re curious about the journey you’ve been on since you last saw each other.

We’ve all navigated life’s unpredictable twists and turns. We’ve faced layoffs, felt stuck in our careers, gone through painful relationships, and now, we’re collectively pondering the future of work with AI. What everyone genuinely cares about at a reunion is reconnecting with you, in this moment. In fact, after our reunion, I saw classmates who were looking for jobs actively reconnecting and helping each other find their next meaningful roles. So, if you’re hearing any negative self-talk, recognize it for what it is: just a voice in your head.

Relationships Thrive on Time and Commitment

Our reunion brought people from all corners of the globe — Japan, Switzerland, New Zealand, Indonesia, and more. They made the journey because they valued these connections, and the time together was truly priceless.

Just like anything else, relationships flourish with commitment. This isn’t just true for parent-child bonds, but for friendships and extended family too. The key is deciding how much you value these relationships, and then showing up for them.

Life is Short. Cherish Every Moment.

Just a few months before our reunion, we lost one of our most energetic, positive, and kind friends to cancer. She was always full of life, and no one ever expected her life to be so short-lived, leaving behind her little girl and husband. There was a poignant moment at the reunion where everyone gathered to share memories of her. We laughed and cried together, remembering.

That moment was a powerful reminder of life’s fragility. Our time here is limited, which makes it even more crucial to cherish every moment we have with the people we value.

I honestly didn’t realize how much my grad school connections would mean 15 years post-graduation. It’s not just the knowledge we gained, but the genuine connections that empower us to live a courageous life, to the best of our ability. If you believe that life is fragile and that genuine connections are truly meaningful, then invest in building and nurturing those lifelong relationships.

Cast aside those negative thoughts about being judged, and just show up at your reunions. People will be genuinely happy to see you, celebrate your journey, and cheer you on as you continue to live courageously. 

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